Rebuilding from Regret: A New Morning Ritual

Field Notes, Tarot Readings

Good morning, dear followers of Standing on the Ledge, Rebuilding from the Rubble. Where do we start today?

You may notice my content is shifting a bit. That’s intentional. I’m trying to focus less on the doom, and more on life—where things are going, what I’m doing today, and what I’m doing tomorrow. My mindset has moved from “oh crap, what do I do now?” to “what am I doing next?” And that matters, because it means I’m not staying stuck.

Part of my morning ritual now is simple: coffee, meds, a quick look at my day, and a short check-in. For me, that check-in includes a glance at the horoscope and a basic four-card tarot spread. Not because the cards “run my life,” but because they give my brain a clean mirror instead of a hamster wheel.

New layer: the Fir Tree (Druidic / Tree Horoscope)

I’m adding a new piece to this ritual. In one Druidic / Celtic tree-horoscope system, my sign is the Fir tree—an evergreen.1

The Fir is winter-proof beauty: color and life in the dead season. The traits connected to Fir include resilience, perceptiveness, longevity, and honesty.1 And yeah—there’s also that “I can feel lonely in a crowd” streak, even when things around me look busy and social.1

If there’s one thing I’m taking from that today, it’s this: evergreen doesn’t mean easy. It means I keep some part of myself alive when everything else looks frozen.

Today’s horoscope note (Cancer)

Today’s message was blunt: I’m getting snagged on an old regret. Running the “what if” tape. Replaying alternate outcomes. Going in circles.

I’m going to call that what it is: a weight. Not a lesson. Not a virtue. Not a punishment that makes me “good.” Just a weight.

I can learn from the past without living inside the courtroom of it. That loop has a name (counterfactual thinking / bargaining-style replay), and the key move is to convert it into one usable step instead of another round of self-prosecution.2

Four-card tarot spread (today)

  • Past: Five of Cups
  • Present: Ace of Cups (reversed)
  • Future: The Emperor (reversed)
  • Me / Querent: Seven of Wands (reversed)

Past — Five of Cups

This is the “loss + fixation” card. The part of me that keeps staring at what spilled instead of what’s still standing.3

In plain language: I’ve been grieving with my eyes locked on the damage. And look—sometimes that’s honest. Sometimes that’s necessary. But sometimes it turns into a loop where the pain gets dressed up as “analysis.”

Here’s the question I’m putting on the table: am I learning, or am I re-litigating?2

If it’s learning, it produces one next step. If it’s re-litigating, it produces exhaustion and shame. Today, the spread is calling that out.

Present — Ace of Cups (reversed)

This one hits like a quiet truth: the cup isn’t filling because something is blocked, confused, or emotionally depleted.4

That doesn’t mean “I’m broken.” It means capacity is low. It means the nervous system is running in some version of low-power mode. I’ve written before: numb isn’t the absence of feeling. It’s a shutdown state—a circuit breaker.5

So today’s present-tense instruction is not “dig deeper.” It’s: restore flow. Refill before I demand output. If my heart is offline, I don’t fix that by whipping it harder. I fix it by making the conditions for return.

Future — The Emperor (reversed)

Upright, the Emperor is structure, order, discipline, and leadership. Reversed, it can point to authority problems—either too much control (rigidity / tyranny) or not enough (instability / poor structure).6

For me, this reads like a warning and a choice:

  • Warning: if I rebuild my life on rage, fear, or pure stubbornness, I’ll build a cage and call it a castle.
  • Choice: create structure that serves life—budget, routines, boundaries, systems—without turning myself into a dictator.

In other words: I don’t need a throne. I need a plan. And the plan has to be human.

Me / Querent — Seven of Wands (reversed)

This is where the truth gets personal. Reversed, this card often points to feeling overwhelmed, overextended, and worn down by constant pressure—like I can’t keep defending my position forever.7

That lands in two ways:

  • I’ve been fighting too many battles at once (even internal ones).
  • I’ve been trying to “hold the hill” alone, and it’s costing me more than it’s worth.

The correction isn’t “fight harder.” The correction is: pick the hill. Set boundaries. Reduce the load. Ask for help in a way that doesn’t collapse me.8

What the spread is saying (one thread)

If I stitch these together, I get a pretty clear storyline:

  1. Stop feeding the regret loop (Five of Cups).
  2. Restore emotional capacity (Ace of Cups reversed).
  3. Build sane structure (Emperor reversed).
  4. Reduce the fight / reduce the load (Seven of Wands reversed).

This is not a prophecy. It’s a field report.

24-hour micro-protocol (small, practical)

I’m borrowing my own “small steps / steady return” logic here. Two lines. One day. No heroics.9

  1. Name the regret in one sentence. Then stop the story. (Label it; don’t litigate it.)
  2. Refill the cup: water + food + one grounding action (2 minutes).
  3. One small fire: one contained task I can finish today—clean edge, done is done.10
  4. One structure move: write tomorrow’s first step before today ends. (Not the whole plan. Just the first step.)
  5. One boundary sentence: “Not today” / “Not like that” / “I can do X, I can’t do Y.”8

That’s it. That’s the rebuild. Not in speeches. In small, repeated, finishable steps.

Godspeed.

Footnotes / References (APA)

  1. Tree-Signs.com. (n.d.). Horoscope for people born under the sign of the Fir Tree. ↩︎
  2. Sulian, L. (2026). Counterfactual thinking: How bargaining shapes our grief. Standing on the Ledge. ↩︎
  3. Labyrinthos. (n.d.). Five of Cups meaning. ↩︎
  4. Labyrinthos. (n.d.). Ace of Cups meaning (reversed). ↩︎
  5. Sulian, L. (2026, January 19). Numb isn’t nothing: The shutdown phase, and how to exit it safely. Standing on the Ledge. ↩︎
  6. Gong, T. (n.d.). The Emperor meaning (upright & reversed keywords). Labyrinthos. ↩︎
  7. Labyrinthos. (n.d.). Seven of Wands meaning (reversed). ↩︎
  8. Sulian, L. (2026). Help without collapse. Standing on the Ledge. ↩︎
  9. Sulian, L. (2026, January 21). Imbolc inspired: A mini ritual for winter reflection. Unplugged Pagan. ↩︎
  10. Sulian, L. (2026). The first 72 hours after collapse. Standing on the Ledge. ↩︎

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Published by Lugh Sulian

Lugh Sulian Standing on the Ledge · Rebuilding from the Rubble Lugh Sulian is a working name for a working moment. This profile exists to hold Standing on the Ledge: Rebuilding from the Rubble—an ongoing, real-time record of what happens after collapse, when old rules stop functioning and new ones haven’t yet earned trust. This is not myth reenactment. Not spiritual bypass. Not curated healing. It’s a field journal from the threshold. The name Lugh points toward skill, clarity, and responsibility carried with awareness. Sulian gestures toward sight—what can be seen when illusion drops away and pretending becomes too expensive. Together, they frame the posture of this work: to look clearly, act deliberately, and refuse to rebuild what already failed. Through short-form video, spoken reflection, and long-form writing, this project explores: Collapse without spectacle Responsibility without authority Burnout as a systems problem, not a personal flaw Pagan cycles as lived practice, not aesthetic Small fires instead of grand rebuilds This space is intentionally unfinished. It documents: Standing still without freezing Moving forward without rushing Learning from rubble instead of hiding it Unplugged-Pagan.com serves as the grounding—seasonal awareness, ritual stripped of performance, and meaning built from experience rather than doctrine. Standing on the Ledge is one expression of that grounding, focused on the human cost of broken systems and the slow work of rebuilding integrity. This is not a teaching platform. It’s a shared watchpost. If you’re here, you’re likely between versions of yourself—tired, alert, uncertain, and still standing. You don’t need answers yet. You need honesty, boundaries, and permission to move at the speed of truth. No conclusions offered. No certainty promised. Still on the ledge. Still watching. Still working the rubble. Godspeed. Optional Short Versions (for profile headers or bios) Short bio (Facebook / site header): Threshold work. Pagan-rooted, process-driven. Documenting collapse, clarity, and the refusal to rebuild what failed.

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2 thoughts on “Rebuilding from Regret: A New Morning Ritual”

  1. Pingback: Physician, Heal Thyself. – Standing on the Ledge
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